Do You Fear Emotional Intimacy?
Discover how comfortable you truly feel with emotional closeness and vulnerability in romantic relationships. Answer 19 questions honestly. Takes 3 minutes!
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About This Test
What It Measures
This test measures fear of intimacy - your discomfort with emotional closeness and vulnerability in romantic relationships. It evaluates your ability to openly communicate needs, share painful past experiences, reveal flaws, and trust someone with your deepest emotions. This goes beyond simple commitment phobia - it measures the specific anxiety around emotional exposure that causes people to hold back their authentic selves even when they genuinely want connection. The scale is based on attachment theory and vulnerability research.
How It Works
You'll respond to 19 statements about emotional communication, self-disclosure, and vulnerability in close relationships. Questions cover sharing personal goals, discussing painful experiences, revealing embarrassing moments, expressing needs, and tolerating emotional intensity. Your score places you on a spectrum from emotionally open (comfortable with full authenticity) to fortress heart (extreme self-protection). The test identifies patterns of emotional guardedness that may sabotage relationships before they deepen.
When to Use This Test
Take this test if partners say you're 'hard to reach emotionally', if relationships end when they get serious, if you pull away when someone gets too close, if you've been called emotionally unavailable, or if you recognize a pattern of keeping people at arm's length. This is also useful if you're in therapy working on vulnerability, if childhood experiences taught you that emotional exposure is dangerous, or if you're trying to understand why deep connection feels threatening despite wanting it.